Priorities...

I have always believed that having priorities is an important asset to have as an individual. I think that someone who has priorities and knows what the important ones are in life are the people that truly appreciate the important things in life. I say this now as I just finished a conversation with my husband that entails him deciding if he wants to go to his slow-pitch softball that, if I have Leilani on my due date, she will barely be two weeks old. In the mean time, since he has been back I have been far from the top of his priorities...at least this is how it seems. I'm trying desperately not to be an emotional pregnant woman, but I feel so unimportant and trapped all at the same time.

Anyone who knows me knows that my family and the people I care about are at the top of my priorities, but it is so hard for me to feel like that is an equal concept. Bryant becomes angry when I say this, but if I say it all the time then shouldn't it be something that no longer occurs?

I feel so alone...even more so now than when he was gone and I don't know where to start trying to fix it all. I just need to feel like I am important and matter; I need to be a first priority and that's far from what I feel like...